What are some of the needs of Suicide Survivors?
Let us be who we've become -- people changed by tragedy. Just try to "be there" and support whatever form our grief takes. Trying to understand is okay, but just caring is enough. Realize that you can't pos-sibly relate to what we are ex-periencing. You don't have to.
Mourning a death by suicide is a lengthy, intense and confusing process. It is also unique; each of us experiences grief in our own way.
Because suicide is a sudden, unexpected and often violent loss, the grief it causes is excruciating, prolonged, and still often stigmatized. This may cause us to withdraw socially. We may even feel responsible for our loss. Those who witness the suicide or find the body may suffer post traumatic stress.
We don't "get over" a suicide. The effects may stabilize, but the loss is forever felt. Our personal values and beliefs are shattered and we are changed emotionally.
Every suicide survivor needs im-mediate support at the time of the loss. Individualized or family coun-seling, medical care, and parti-cipation in on-going support groups can be extremely helpful.
To read a heartbreaking first-hand account of the aftermath of a loved one's suicide, click HERE.
Suicide Survivors
"There are always two parties to a death; the person who dies and the survivors who are bereaved."
-Arnold Toynbee
A suicide survivor is an individual who has lost someone he/she cared for deeply to suicide. The victim may have been a parent, child, spouse, sibling, other relative, partner, or friend. It is estimated that every suicide leaves six to eight "survivors."
More YouTube Videos:
Dedicated to Suicide Survivor's
Katie Couric's Notebook: Teen Suicide
National Survivor's of Suicide Day
Lidia's Story: Suicide Loss Survivor
Clip from AFSP's National Survivors of Suicide Day Program (2009)
"One often calms one's grief by recounting it." ~ Pierre Corneille
It's okay to talk about "it" because that's all that's on our minds. Let any statements we make about respon-sibility, blame, or guilt just flow. It will sort itself out over time. Please mention our loved one, whether it was a child, spouse, sibling, parent or other loved one. Avoid setting any timetable for recovery as there isn't any.
Some suicide survivors find it uncomfortable to speak about the loss. With this in mind, it's wise simply to ask, "How are you feeling? Can we talk about it?" And then be willing to listen.
Taken in part from lifegard.tripod.com.
Survivor Support Group
WHAT IS A SUICIDE SURVIVOR SUPPORT GROUP?
It is a form of mutual self-help where those bereaved get together with others to share their experiences in dealing with their loss. Groups may be peer-led by a volunteer who is also a suicide griever or they may be led by a professional. Groups may be open-ended or closed-ended. The former meets once or twice a month on an ongoing basis throughout the year. It may be joined at any time and discussions are "open." The latter usually run for several weeks at various times during the year. There are (typically) set discussion topics.
WHY ARE SUICIDE SURVIVOR SUPPORT GROUPS EFFECTIVE?
The NY State Office of Mental Health gives four reasons that support groups are effective :
1. Normalization
One of the most significant and helpful realizations for a survivor of suicide to have is that his feelings are normal, given the situation. In a group setting, it is reassuring to hear that others share their fears and their losses, and that it is not pathological to feel this way. In fact, it is perfectly normal.
2. Understanding
This begins when the person starts to open up. By telling his/her story by verbalizing it - they are beginning a process of organizing thoughts and feelings. This may be the first step in understanding the "whys", "what ifs", and "why didn't I?"
3. Monitoring
The third benefit is monitoring suicide risk. Given the link between the suicide of a family member and the increased risk for other family members, this is a critical benefit. Peer support groups may simultaneously provide healthy role models for grieving survivors while increasing social support.
4. Making sense of the suicide of a loved one is an emotional journey
Support groups provide educational resources to help educate survivors regarding the nature of suicide and suicide bereavement.
How can friends help suicide grievers? Let them be who they've become -- people changed by tragedy. Just try to "be there." Support whatever form their grief takes. Trying to understand is okay, but just caring is enough. Realize that you can't possibly relate to what they are experiencing and that you don't have to. It's okay to talk about "it" because that's all that's on their minds. Expect some anger and conflicting expressions towards their lost loved one as emotions are in turmoil. Let any statements they make about responsibility, blame, or guilt just flow. It will sort itself out over time. Please mention their loved one, whether it was a child, spouse, sibling, parent or other loved one. Avoid setting any timetable for recovery as there isn't any. Bear in mind that others may not be supportive. Some suicide grievers may be unable to express their feelings because of where they are or their relationship to the victim at the time of the loss or the feelings of the victim's family toward them.
www. lifegard.tripod.com
~
"If suffering and death in someone close to us
brings us to explore the limits of our
capacity for strength and love and cheerfulness,
if it leads us to discover sources of
consolation we never knew before,
then we make the person a witness
for the affirmation of life
rather than its rejection."
~ Dorothee Soelle
German Theologian
Latest News
Upcoming Events
| Thu May 17 @03:00PM - 07:00PM Open Your Mind- NAMI Utah Open House May 17, 2012 |
| Fri May 18 @05:00PM - Artists' Project Reception |
Sign Up for E-newsletter
Stay in touch with NAMI Utah.
